Oh how life has changed....

Well I probably should have updated the blog sooner with my life progress but things just got a little crazy and since I'm up past my bedtime tonight anyway I thought I should write a blog post instead of sleeping....so smart I know. So life in Murray continues on.  I got a job about a month after I moved at the Intermountain Central Lab. For all of you who know my feelings about needles and blood can rest easy I just do billing in the lab.....no contact with blood involved.  I do all of the Medicare billing for the lab which brings it's own set of unique challenges.  I like the job so far and I am very blessed that I was only jobless for a month.  I definitely would have gone crazy if I would have had to wait much longer!!!!

Dropping everything in your life and moving to a new place (even if it is just 30 minutes away from your old life) brings challenges that I'm quite sure I was not ready for.  As I've seen less and less of my Provo life, I really wonder what I am doing here. Because I know I'm suppose to be here,  I'm sure that some direction will present itself if I keep moving forward....until then I just take everything day by day.

The hardest transition has been with the ward. Living in Provo for 6 years I am used to everyone in the ward living within the same apartment complex (or a complex really close), it's a little different when your singles ward covers the area of three stakes (even if Utah Stakes are small that's a lot of distance). The distance makes it a little more difficult to get to know people in the ward, especially since a lot of people grew up with each other and already have the friend group thing figured out.   The first few weeks I was reluctant to join in.  I didn't mind missing going to my own ward and go back to Alta or to one of my sister's wards but I was soon reminded by my dear roommate and I will get out what I put into the ward (P.S. Jessica deserves a medal or something for dealing with my craziness).  Along the way in my trying I was giving up...I was just done....and then the Lord worked in His mysterious way and I got a calling....in the Relief Society Presidency...yes shocker I know.

This calling has given me a reason to be a part of the ward which is important because I had one foot out the door....I really wasn't going to leave church I was just ready to be less engaged in the ward.  I have met so many amazing girls in the ward and I'm glad that people listen to revelation!!! Still with the calling some days are better than others....luckily there are good times to counteract the times when I feel totally awkward and dumb and unable to carry on a normal conversation.  It comes down to the repeating story of my life....I struggle to make friends for a while and then hopefully the pattern continues when I find excellent friends again....I'm really ready for that upswing to happen. Until then...I just keep keeping on....

A Leap of Faith....

I moved into my first big girl apartment yesterday. Leading up to the move I had so many emotions. I was excited, nervous, apprehensive, terrified, and just plain scared. As I looked for apartments I realized more and more that my life was changing in a big way. As the realization struck that my new location and my old job wouldn't exactly work together I was slightly beside myself. I always like to hold on to the past and keep it a part of me until I fully step into the future but it won't be as much the case this time. I'm not getting thrown out of my old job but I see the days coming to an end and it scares me. I grew up at that job. The people there helped me to grow. I would be no where without them. But all little girls must grow up.

In the past week I have grown more emotionally than I thought I would. I started applying to jobs for the first time ever and trying to set up cable and utilities and mail changing and started packing. I was too busy worrying about logistics to feel the emotion of leaving everything behind. When I woke up this morning (or yesterday morning as the case may be) it officially hit me. I have just left everything behind and I'm walking into the great unknown.

This is the moment in my life where I hope what I have learned will pay off somehow. This is where faith comes in. I always believed that I had faith but it was a guided guarded kind of thing. Now, as I sit unable to sleep because of the many many decisions ahead of me, I realize that this is the leap of faith they talk about. The Spirit tells me this is the right move. The only thing holding me back is fear. Everyone is excited for this great change for me but right now all I can do is fear. Eventually, as I move forward, that fear will fade. I will get a job, I will find new friends (there isn't anything wrong with the old ones, trust me), I will start a new life. There will be happy times and sad times. There will be good times and bad times. All I know is that I'm moving forward into the dark, taking that big leap of faith and hoping that I've made the right decision.

Something inside tells me that I have.....

Another One of Those Catch-Up Posts.....

Well since I have greatly failed at blogging over the past few months I feel I cannot begin until I do a quick recap of my life.....

October:
Celebrated my 24th birthday
The entire Worthen clan went to Disneyland and the beach (it was a little cold but well worth it to see our whole family on its a small world)
The continuation of BYU football with great moments like Riley Nelson giving a ref a high five after scoring a TD.


November:
BYU basketball started again (and that ALWAYS make me a little more happy)
Somehow got tennis elbow
Thanksgiving at the new Paulson Home
Finally got a flatscreen TV

December:
Went to the Festival of Trees
Took a week off of work to go home for Christmas and then
Go to the Armed Forces Bowl in Dallas (where I introduced my brother to a hospitality room)

January:
Continued my basketball watching days
Went on a road trip with Kaylee to see a UNLV basketball game (and got to sit in the student section thanks to Lane and Audrey)
Watched my first political debate (it made me feel just as anxious as a BYU sporting event let me tell you)

February:
Well this month has been a little less exciting. It's been more about working and saving and BYU sports and preparing to move to Salt Lake in April.


Well there's the rundown....if I know myself there will be another one of these in just a few months....